blogging at 3am ? why not.

i need a change.
- to get away from what i was, because the old me was heading in the wrong direction.

i've found the clubbing and drinking to be so overrated. If you could dumb in a shotglass, we all know i've had one too many and i think it's about time i get smart.
I want to be realistic though. it's not the end of my clubbing and drinking days, but it's the end of my excessive drinking, random hook ups and bad decisions.

lately i've realised alot though.
friends aren't forever - they come, they go, they change.
but there are definitely beautiful moments along the way with those who you consider real in your life, for the time being atleast.
with this being said, there are those ugly moments that bring you down, dishes out by those people who aren't deserving of your second glance.

one person in particular though makes me wonder - what the FUCK was i thinking?
you show no respect for girls. infact, you show no regard for anyone but yourself and NO i don't mind if you get the shit beaten out of you anymore. they saw something that deep down i knew, but tried so hard to ignore.
so next time i won't be holding them back from hurting you.
i didn't want to see you hurt last time because i knew my asian friends would be hurt in the process - but what's it to me ? you're no longer my problem.

on the other hand, not all has gone down hill. one of my closets friends shared some good news with me. and as jealous i am that she has found someone that she likes, and likes her back i couldn't be happier for her. she is one of the most derserving girls and i think what she does for her friends always seem to go unnoticed. i hope everything works out well for her because it's about time people realised how amazing she really is.